customized boxes to nourish the soul after loss

 For weeks I've been planning to post today about Small Business Saturday and deals and discounts and new collections.  But today I just can't.  Because today surprised me as a crying day.

I spent the week of Thanksgiving with our best friends from the early years of our marriage.  In our mid 20s, my husband and I lived in Washington D.C.  Over one thousand miles from our families, and dripping with unencumbered free time, these friends became our family.  Sitting in their living room and drinking wine in their kitchen, we became the people we decided to be.  Together, we struggled at work and succeeded at work.  We faced problems in our marriages and fixed it all again.  We miscarried a pregnancy and got pregnant again.  They held us together through it all.  But then, after four years in this tight knit community, we announced our plans to move 2,000 miles to Colorado.

Our move set off a chain of events over the last five years that left us bruised and battered.  The last year had been one of change as we move towards restoration.  And overall, it's been a sweet redemption.  But yesterday, dropping my friends off at the airport, I drove away in tears.  Something about their presence reminded me of all that had broken, and all that still wasn't repaired.  And sometimes, after years of living in the brokenness, you come to the hard conclusion that some things will never be restored to their former beauty.  Some things come with scars.  And hear me when I say that I fully believe that scars can line us and break us and be beautiful in their own powerful way.  But sometimes, I still need a crying day because what I lost hurts.

So beautiful woman, if your holiday was good and beautiful but now you're a teary mess, I think the holidays can be a jerk like that.  And if you're feeling disoriented because things are better some days and worse other days, I think life can also be a jerk like that.  So today, I'm raising a toast to all of us who keep our chins up, but then sometimes let ourselves be human and turn our chins down.  Life is the craziest and most confusing mixture of the good and bad.

And if you need me today, I'll just be here trying to recoup from my crying day.  Sorry I never finished that gift guide I've been promising everyone.  Sorry I have no awesome deals to share with you.  Sorry I'm basically a mess right now.  But two things I do know... naps help and retail therapy is real.  It is Shop Small Saturday after all.  


 

November 26, 2016 by Johanna Mutz

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